Ageing
Growing up tall and skinny, I endured relentless bullying, which taught me to shrink into the background, to avoid drawing attention to myself. I never learnt about fashion or how to apply makeup. That was for the popular girls, attracting the boys. Not the tall-geeky-library-loving-teachers pet. Which may explain why I find myself having mascara wiped off my face now, like a parent wipes chocolate off a toddler!
Navigating Society's Beauty Standards and Finding Wisdom in Ageing
As the years have passed me by, from teenage, young adult, parenthood into the Menopause years, I find myself increasingly frustrated by society's relentless pressure for us to all conform to certain standards of behaviour and appearance at each life stage. Daily marketing pushed at us, for the latest fads, fashion, pills, gadgets, surgery or the most hated term ever #Hack... All to hold back the hands of time.
Stop the ride. I want to get off!
I look at my reflection daily. I see a rawness that's unique to me. Isn't what you see of me "Good enough"? My past emotions and story of life are painted in my thin lips, descending jowls, deepening Spanish cannon lines. I'm used to them greeting me each morning. With increased intensity, I hasten to add, when on go the glasses to catch the rogue facial hair. I don't like it. No one does. But let's take off those rose-tinted specs.
This is called AGE.It's NORMAL.Its NATURAL.We SHOULD look different from our 20s. And from each other.
That face. Those wobbly bits. That's me. That's who I AM. I should be happier with me. But it's hard. There's so much conflicting information to navigate out there for those of us "ageing", and I am fatigued with the constant swiping them away. I am told that I should conceal my grey hair, but celebrate it. Wear age appropriate makeup, yet go au naturel like Pam Anderson. I should cover up, unless I've undergone breast lifts or butt enhancements, in which case, it's encouraged to flaunt those changes in the smallest bikini and declaring I have the perfect 50+ year old body!
Let's get back to being allowed to be ourselves, eh? And loving who we see as we look back. Let's get real. Life is way too short. With each passing day, I'm reminded of life's fleeting nature, prompting me to cherish simplicity and to live in the moment....In my ageing body.
I just wish I could have been there for the younger me. To give her some wisdom as she navigated her life decisions. I would have told her to stop worrying about not being good enough, too thin, too fat, too tall, too quiet, too sensitive, too this and too that. Just be yourself in that moment. If your so-called friends, partners, husband's, work colleagues, don't like you as you are, then please don't change to suit them. Change what you want to change. Never change to become what others expect.
To you reading this. Stand firm in your authenticity, refuse to conform to standards set by others. Be yourself, age like a good wine, and find beauty in the uniqueness in your individual journey, and the marks it leaves on you.
Love yourself for exactly who you are, at whatever age that may be
